It’s time to talk about comfort.

I promised you on Monday,

that we would be diving head first into the tough love.

So, in the spirit of that promise, today(night)?

OOOOOF 😮‍💨 

We must discuss an important question:

1️⃣ A PROBLEM: you don’t wanna do it

Yes, the structure is back ☝️ 
Monday I was just being cute & different.

So, there’s something you don’t want to do, huh?

Something that isn’t even hard, but you aren’t in the mood.

Something SO simple it will take five minutes, but the mere thought of it has you frozen in your tracks?

The real question is:

WHY DON’T YOU WANNA DO IT?

I mean, is it a boundary?

You know, a barrier to protect your well-being and ensure you are not compromising your integrity, values, etc??

“I don’t drink, but thanks.”

💅 

“I actually will NOT be crossing the picket line, thank you!”

💪 

“No, you cannot touch me.”

👏 

OR

is it just the edge of your comfort zone?

“Speak at the event? Oh, no. No, I’m not really a public speaker. I’ve never even done it before! What would I say?”

“Study abroad? Oh I won’t do that I mean I’ve never left the state, much less the country.”

IS it a boundary you’re setting?

OR

IS IT JUST THE BOUNDARY OF YOUR COMFORT ZONE?

and you’re soooooo unwilling to compromise an ounce of comfort to see it through?

You are SO USED TO your current situation that you refuse to push through the (admittedly DIFFICULT) process of uncomfy growth to go through proverbial metamorphosis??

You would rather STAY stuck. STAY unhappy with a situation. STAY frozen in time.

Rather than to compromise your temporary comfort for a future of growth and change like you’ve never seen before.

2️⃣ A REALIZATION: compromise is a tool

I’m SO tired of hearing about compromise.

People fixate on the idea that you must compromise things you want to be safe, comfortable, or happy.

When in reality you need to switch that around!

You need to compromise your comfort to be safe, get things you want, and find a way to truly enjoy happiness.

Compromise is a TOOL, not a defeat.

USE compromise to your advantage.

I haven’t bought contact lenses in months.

Why?

I’m growing a lot right now.

I have softwares I want to test, skills I want to acquire, and a company I am building from the ground up with my business partner, Abdullah.

No VC funding. No easy grants or loans. Just two people doing excellent work.

That type of growth is exciting. It is aligned. It lights me up!

It is however, expensive.

Because I WANT this growth, I’m in a season of choosing investments that fuel my work OR fill my personal cup.

Wearing contacts?

That’s 10% function, 90% comfort/ease.

I’m USED to it.

Yet, for the last ~ year? I’ve only worn contacts maybe 30 of those days.

And honestly? I’m chillin.

Will I buy contacts again? Of course.

I like them 💁‍♀️ 

Sometimes I’ll want to just roam freely without fear of falling (I’m clumsy at times) and breaking my now one source of vision.

BUT COULD I LIVE WITHOUT THEM WAY LONGER IF THE CIRCUMSTANCES REQUIRED?

A year ago I would have called you crazy and said absolutely not.

After a year of choosing my goals over my comfort? I have a different answer: “well, yes”

3️⃣ THE SOLUTION: discernment 🙂 

My brother and I were chatting Thursday night (hence why this came late, #sorrynotsorry)

and he said something that stuck out to me when talking about a sticky situation.

“The only difference between me and them in that moment was that I used discernment, made a choice, and moved on.”

SO often, we are as people unwilling to think critically about our own choices and behaviors.

In a society (and work culture especially) that rewards hero complexes and yelling the loudest to defend one’s opinions, there is no tangible incentive for utilizing our discernment.

You can live a long, healthy (debatable!) life without ever really getting out of your comfort zone.

You can honestly live in denial of the things that bring you discomfort and just call everything you don’t want to do a “boundary”

And that’s fine if that’s what you want.

Weird, but fine.

BOUNDARY:
keeps me safe, upholds my morals, or centers my consent

A boundary is me not driving without glasses on because my near sightedness is abysmal.
(for now, I’m coming for you LASIK!)

(the “boundary” AKA edge of my) COMFORT ZONE:
keeps me from uncomfortable growth or change

The boundary of my comfort zone was me refusing for so long to wear contacts *less often because I had to be a little more spatially aware. 🙄 

Ask the question.

Be honest with yourself about the answer.

4️⃣ THE NUANCE ✨ 

Consent matters always.

Comfort is often misconstrued as a “need” and that’s really holding us back as a society.

Until next Thursday,

• the kids are alright,

• the adults? we have work to do…

• & you are capable of SO much more than you know

Love,

your business Mom 💟 

You don’t ever have to lose an idea again 💅

I got you 👇️ 

I learned how to vibe code, and got paid to do it 🫣 

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