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“VALUE”

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back to our regularly scheduled programming, AKA the Thursday newsletter:

😮‍💨 AHEM,

I’ve been thinking a lot about “value” lately…

specifically for one reason: my father

One thing he loved loves to do is remind me of ALL the things I don’t know,

which often includes the idea of VALUE

Like 👇️ 

• the value of a dollar

• the value of quality time

• the value of experience

• the value of ethics

• the value of hard work

• the value of maintenance

• the value of this list goes on (😂)

In today’s economy though?
One continues to stand out from that list.

And it makes sense why he’s so passionate about this.

He entered the boxing ring of life with some stellar advantages
(see: white man born during Baby Boomer generation, also see: brilliant and creative)

Despite that, he was catching little strays left and right.

My dad grew up grateful to get braces, for which his parents took out a loan against their home.

He worked multiple jobs to put my mom through nursing school when they took away her scholarship, because QUOTE “the last girl that got married dropped out.”

INSANE, and very 1970s-coded 🙄 

(for those wondering, yes she graduated 💅)

Essentially, he takes nothing for granted when it comes to value.

Easy wins? Celebrate, but hold tight.

Tough mountains to climb? Source hiking boots and get your butt up the mountain!

Like most parents, he made a point to do anything he could to make things even 1% better for his kids.

He taught us to appreciate the privileges we have, and grind for anything we were missing.

He taught us to value the dollar for what it is: a currency to exchange for valuable items, experiences, and resources. 

moving on,

1️⃣ A PROBLEM: hindsight is 2020

I don’t know about you, but I’m so tired of wildly successful people telling me horror stories of rock bottom failures YEARS LATER.

💁🏻‍♀️ “Yes, yes, I was super broke but now I make millions and here is why you’re broke.”

Awesome, but I have kids. I can’t “work 7 days a week and sleep when I’m dead” like you did to “get to the top” because CPS will take my children. I’m happy for you. This just won’t work for me. Your method worked, but stop acting like we can all do it that way.

🙋🏽‍♂️ “I was sick then. I run triathlons now. Just jog a mile a day like I did.”

Amazing, man. I can’t even WALK a mile without getting winded, so where do I actually START? I’d love to “just jog a mile a day” but between that and work I’ll need 27-hour days to make it that far.

Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE A GOOD SUCCESS STORY, but blanket applying it to the masses just doesn’t sit well.

We don’t talk enough about sitting IN your journey, sitting WITH failures,

and the value of a dollar WHEN YOU DON’T HAVE ANY.

It was easy when I started making 6-figures to realize how much a check will not solve:

• your childhood trauma

• your friendship breakup

• or your sense of self-worth.

When I was building the structures and services to EARN those 5-figure months though? You couldn’t have made me stop working under threat of violence.

What I did to build my business? Might not work for you.

I was chasing stability.

I was chasing security.

I was chasing “making it”

so I could be “successful”

and have “everything I needed.”

That lifestyle led to ups and downs.

$30k months (DOLO)

$2k months wondering where the next check was coming from

Stress. Elation. Stress. Excitement. Wonder. Awe. Oooop, stress again. Repeat.

Rather than stability, I got a lot of success, a lot of cycles, and a LOT of headache to go with it.

With hindsight, elements of what I did might be your key to success, the missing piece you needed.

So many of my greatest wins have come from learning from others.

Learn from my mistakes, adopt my solutions to prevent them.

Take what serves you, and leave what doesn’t on the table for someone else.

Ultimately, we are all in a constant state of flux, because the world is.

I know people who have built multimillion dollar business and had to start over from nothing because of

• market crashes

• addiction

• divorce

• legal troubles

• you name it

I’ve also seen people with every possible odd stacked against them find creative ways to not just succeed, but THRIVE.

There’s billions of people on this planet making decisions every day.

You cannot build some reliable formula to consistent success.

You must CONSTANTLY evaluate, assess, audit, whatever you want to call it! Then learn, pivot, and keep pushing.

2️⃣ A REALIZATION: much like a dollar, we must “exchange” things we hold dear to earn value.

When I started growing my business,

I was exchanging TOO MUCH of my health for a check…

but I still needed the checks though 👀 

For a while, I exchanged additional work I COULD have taken on, just so I could spend time with my beautiful, insanely amazing kiddos outside of when I was doing domestic labor for them.

When you don’t have alternative currency to exchange, a dollar is valuable.

BUT

When you have an excess of dollars, and gain the things you are looking for, the individual dollar’s value diminishes.

So where does that leave the value of a dollar?
(DAD, I know you read these, so feel free to chime in 😉)

3️⃣ A SOLUTION: track the fluctuation of value
& accept that the value of a dollar changes.

You have $5k of income and only $3k of expenses?

Oh, congrats friend! You’re rich

You’re making that same $5k with 3 kids, a grandmother to take care of, and student loan debt?

Might not hit the same.

You might be feeling more ramen and oven heat than whatever Cardi is doing up there.

That $5k month is one person’s DREAM and another’s NIGHTMARE.

I’m not one of those people who is going to tell you that you ALWAYS have to center your desires and everything will work out in the end.

I’m 100% in support of chasing your dreams. Spending time with your loved ones. Spending your life in a way that makes you happy.

What I’m not in support of is acting like pure belief alone is going to pay your rent or keep your car from being towed when the bank comes to call.

The value of a dollar is in the eye of the beholder
(and the economy, let’s be so real)

Sometimes, you’re:

• going to have to work restless nights waiting tables until 2am

• sleeping on the floor with no mattress because you dropped out of college

• waking up at the crack of dawn the next day just to keep the lights on

• making dinner for your boyfriend’s family and eating on the floor, because you also have no kitchen table

• living shift to shift in hopes that your regulars will help you scrape together bill money

• NOT knowing the value of a dollar because, lowkey? you could always pick up another shift and hope for the best

Other times you might ball out:

on everything EXCEPT your health

because for the first time in your life,

your level of work output is giving you a similar return on investment 💰️ 

and you’re in a “year of YES” or whatever we were saying back then

The world (especially the financial one) is not fair. It’s not pretty. It’s not kind.

Systems are meant to keep a few wealthy and keep the rest of us struggling, or exchanging every other thing we hold valuable in pursuit of material improvement.

You gotta do what you gotta do, and that’s ok.

Just make sure when you get the chance to make things better for yourself,

you take a deep breath, eyes forward, and reevaluate the “value” of every dollar you’re pursuing.

4️⃣ THE NUANCE ✨ 

Like I told y’all last week, life is not linear.

Just when you get a stroke of good luck, another shoe will always drop 👟 

Be kind to yourself.

Take your time.

And as long as you’re making 1% improvement on these challenges each day, you will find yourself stronger and more resilient when you need it most.

Until next Thursday, please remember:

🎵 

• I love you

• you love me

• we’re a happy family

• with a newsletter, podcast, and a gif(t) from me to you,

won’t you say you love (this community and share it with 3 people who need it) too?

🎵 

and if you do, let me know so I can send the love back your way 🥰 

Love,

your business Mom 💟 

Like it when I lecture you?

Tune into my guest lecture in ClickUp’s SUMMER SCHOOL next week ☀️ 

Want to get real about GROWTH?

(kinda like we did in this newsletter? 😏)

Learn from host Adiele Greatman as he grills me about:

• how people can approach growth today

• the real strategies behind growth mindset

• what I’ve learned from my best ideas and biggest mistakes.

Other ways to connect 💟 

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See you next Thursday, space cowboy